Madeleine McCann's mum Kate's brave confession about state of marriage to Gerry

It's been 18 years since Madeleine McCann disappeared during a family break in Portugal - and mum Kate McCann has never given up hope.

Madeleine, who was just three years old at the time, went missing from the McCann's holiday flat in Praia da Luz on May 3, 2007. Extensive search efforts followed, but the little girl's location remains unknown to this day.

Having experienced every parent's worst nightmare, Kate and her husband Gerry have remained resilient for their twins, Sean and Amelie, while persistently searching for the child whose birthday they still mark every single year.

For Kate, memories of her missing eldest daughter are constantly present.

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Today, Kate will appear at Leicester Crown Courtfor the trial ofJulie Wandelt, who is accused of stalking the McCann family after she claimed to be Madeleine McCann.

As the trial continues, the Mirror examines Kate McCann's current life, from her difficult marital struggles to her significant new role...

Marriage pressure and intimacy issues

Kate, now 57, has previously spoken openly about the impact Madeleine's disappearance has had on her marriage, with intimacy becoming a particularly challenging subject.

In her 2011 memoir, 'Madeleine: Our daughter's disappearance and the continuing search for her', Kate disclosed: "The first was my inability to permit myself any pleasure, whether it be reading a book or making love to my husband. The second stemmed from the revulsion stirred up by my fear that Madeleine had suffered the worst fate we could imagine: falling into the hands of a paedophile."

Such horrific images 'tormented' Kate to the point where the mere thought of intimacy 'disgusted' her.

She revealed: "I worried about Gerry and me. I worried that if I didn't get our sex life on track our whole relationship would break down."

Fortunately, Gerry was understanding of her struggles, and the pair remain solid today.

New job

Kate stepped away from her role as a GP to focus entirely on finding Madeleine, but in 2021, she chose to return to medicine during the coronavirus crisis.

A family insider revealed toThe Sun that Kate had started working as a medic in Leicester hospitals, which are among the nation's hardest-hit regions.

The source revealed: "Kate's back working as a doctor. She's helping out at her local hospitals now and not doing any surgery work. She has thrown herself back into a full-time job to assist others in need. There's such a demand for qualified medics during these unprecedented times."

Heartbreaking ritual

Despite the years that have passed since Madeleine vanished, Kate continues purchasing gifts for her daughter each birthday and Christmas.

Speaking in 2017, marking the tenth anniversary of Madeleine's disappearance, Kate explained: "I do all the present buying. I think about what age she is and buy something that, whenever we find her, will still be appropriate so there's a lot of thought goes into it."

The heartbroken mother also described Madeleine's birthday as a "difficult time because that's when you really feel her absence".

In her book, Kate describes how the family has continued to mark her birthday by holding sweet tea parties, after which they fill Madeleine's room with gifts they still hope she'll one day unwrap.

Kate wrote: "Monday, May 12, 2008, was Madeleine's fifth birthday. As we've continued to do since, we had a tea party at home, with balloons cake, cards, and presents. The presents go into Madeleine's room to await her return. Her pink bedroom remains exactly as it was when she left it but it's a lot busier now. There are gifts people have sent – from teddy bears to rosary beads – and photographs and pictures Sean and Amelie have drawn for her pinned on the walls."

She continued: "She also has a keepsake box in which the twins leave little things for her: the last sweet in their packet, a new drawing, sometimes just a leaf that has taken their fancy. Everyone sits in there from time to time to feel close to her. The children sometimes borrow toys to play with for a while but they always return them for Madeleine."

In 2023, on missing Madeleine's 20th birthday party, Kate and Gerry took to the Official Find Madeleine Campaign Facebook page with the following determined message: "Happy birthday Madeleine. Still very much missed. Still looking. For as long as it takes."